The Assertive Behaviour Lab

Section 1

Behaviour Explorer

Select a category to compare how each communication style shows up in expressions, behaviour, and body language.

Aggressive

Forceful I want statements

Subjective statements expressed as facts: It is obvious... My experience tells me...

Boastfulness: I am never wrong

Threatening questions: Why on earth did you do that?

Sarcasm

Abrasive, bossy and controlling of others

Goal: To get an outcome and to be right

Uses verbal and even physical force

Insensitive to others

Disrespectful to others

Expresses feelings in an angry manner

Feels superior, easily gets angry

Interrupts and talks over people

Abrupt and loud

Intense, threatening stare

Finger pointing

Thumps desk

Arms crossed

I am OK. You are not OK.

Passive

Rambling I statements with hesitancy: umm, err, uh, maybe

I do not want to bother you but...

Profuse apologies

Self-regulatory: I should..., I must..., I really must...

Puts themselves down

Fearful of rejection or the anger of others

Goal: To play it safe and to be liked

Fearful of being shouted at or subjected to forceful behaviour

Sensitive to disapproval or rejection

Disrespectful to self

Keeps feelings to themselves

Feels anxious, sad and misunderstood

Afraid to speak up

Hesitancy in voice, whining tone

Evasive eye contact

Nervous movements

Hand wringing

Hand covers mouth at times

You are OK. I am not OK.

Assertive

Clear, brief I statements: I think..., In my opinion...

Distinction between facts and opinion

Constructive criticism

Suggestions rather than advice: How about this way?

Few assumptions

Wise, calm and collected. More observant than reactive

Goal: To express themselves honestly and kindly

Refrains from using verbal or physical force

Sensitive and caring to self and others

Respectful to self and others

Expresses feelings freely, yet tactfully

Feels secure, confident and loving

Speaks openly

Steady, firm tone with an even pace of speech

Maintains eye contact empathetically

Confident posture and gestures

Open gestures

Gestures to support understanding

I am OK. You are OK.

Section 2

Scenario Quiz

Read each workplace scenario. Identify whether the communication style shown is Aggressive, Passive, or Assertive.

Quiz Complete

Section 3

Self-Check Spectrum

Slide each dial to reflect how you typically respond. Your personal behaviour profile will appear in the chart.

Your Behaviour Profile

Adjust the sliders to generate your personal profile.